Blog: Love Letters

Grandma Randy

“I like the feel like having shared pages and the reminder that I have spent a lot of time with this verbal friend”

In my living room, in the corner, stands a bookshelf filled with all of my books that I consider “workbooks.” Along the top shelf are my scripts, along the bottom shelf are many vocal selections and scores. Near the middle though, sits a series of worn and torn books on the history of theatre, many series of classic plays that will not be mixed with the other scripts, and a used copy of the play “love letters”

The interesting connection with that particular play is that one, it is one of my favorites, and two, each of these books is a love letter from one lover of theatre to another. As I pick them up from the shelf, I am thinking of the wonderful woman who handed them down to me.
Throughout my life, I have had many mentors in writing, in music, in drama, in life. From the amazing support of parents, and teachers, to friends and extended family, support has never been in short supply. I know some amazing people.

---

One of these amazing wonders is a woman named Grandma Randy, who upon seeing the light of theatre light up my eyes as a child, encouraged it any chance she got. She wasn’t my actual grandmother, but, the mother of my mom’s friend, she always took an interest in me. Growing up, she always asked what I was doing, always told me about shows. I remember seeing her in Arsenic and Old Lace at the La Habra Theatre Depot, and going to my first cast party at her house as a child. I remember her there when I stepped off stage after my first performance as the Baker in Into the Woods. She was always there, and while this support was amazing, nothing compared to a few years later when, at 19, I received a package in the mail.
Inside, was a book, “Classic through Modern Drama” and upon opening, an inscription to be read.

“I have decided to share my library with you, Mark, while I still can, know you might enjoy it.”- 1999

Over the next year, these random packages continued….with “Classic Theatre: the fundamentals of Drama”

“In gratitude for our friendship and with hope and certainty that you will always allow Drama to teach you about the world of mankind and about man at his finest, allowing you to emulate the best of virtues, grace, kindness, discipline, dedication to things worthy of your talents, love, mercy, compassion, and the ability to see something worthwhile in all persons,”

Such eloquence! Such a way with words. We would sit in my room, during my parents Christmas parties and talk about theatre, when not many other would know just how deep my passion and knowledge for the subject was, she knew. And she continued to feed it. By chance, I found out she was in a play that I love, “Love Letters” about reading a series of letters between friends. And suddenly, as I pick through this shelf, I am in that play with her…reading these letters.

The next package contained her copy of her script, complete with her notes, highlighted lines, and blocking. 

“I wanted you to add this to your collections. Know you won’t need it for years, maybe never, but there’s a part of me in it. All your efforts are important to me!!! The “Connect” I’m so grateful to you for coming and being there. 
Always, Randy” – 2000

The next letter I received was not from Randy, but from my Mom, who had sent me a copy of a letter Randy had written to her. 

“Parents, it seems to me, so often get short changed in hearing praise for their offspring’s outstanding character and caring. Someday, as you pursue your teaching career, you too will have acquired a nice little pile of genuine expressions of gratitude for your influence. They always come as such a shock to me. Today’s mail brought the most beautiful thank you shock I have EVER received. I always really questioned whether I should send Mark some books with thoughts like “This is old classic stuff- he’ll laugh at ol’ Grandma Randy.” But I took a chance. This letter of today means so much to me. It is so well written and expresses gratitude and appreciation far-so far- beyond my expectations. If he were here, he’d be smothered with old lady kisses, poor guy. Then a few finger crunching hand shakes followed by pinch in the rear for a humility reminder. Much of the gratitude I feel today is because of your influence so please, mother of Mark, accept my thanks. Could you believe he addressed the envelope (caps, no less) GRANDMA RANDY!!!! Talk about a loving ego boost. WOW!!! I’ll bask in his letter for weeks and then see what needs to be “handed over” to the young and loved. Perhaps, though, you’ll, meanwhile, share my joy with him and insert please if convenient his birth date and email. 

Loving and gratefully, 
Grandma Randy”

Through books, through letters, and through performance the inspiration continued. That December I got “Masters of Modern Drama” in the mail. I opened it before I even stepped back from the front porch.

“I hope you can find a place in your library for this old book. Few of these plays are performed anymore. They contain great character studies, but audiences prefer more to be entertained today. Someday, though, on your own or in a Drama Class you might spend some time with these great playmakers.

This book, as you can see, is beat up. I hope you don’t mind that. I have a bible that is much worse than this, coverless, pages marked and torn, and someone said, “Why don’t you get it rebound?” Why? Should I give a dear friend a facelift? A new make up job to “change” them? I guess a book would last longer but I like the feel like having shared pages and the reminder that I have spent a lot of time with this verbal friend. Perhaps for worse, two or three pages are missing, I used them when I played “Josephine” in “The mad woman of chaillot” at the bing theatre, by the museum of art in LA. Little theatres from all over did play excerpts. The event lasted all day. When the awards were given that day, I was shocked to hear my name in the best supporting actress category. The one play I always wanted to do lies within these covers. “The Visit” doubt it will ever be performed anywhere for years…then if the proverbial pendulum swings, someone will realize its characters are timeless.

I will always be interested in what you are doing with your life, Mark.”

Books, letters, conversations that picked up where they left off even after I moved to New York. The interest was always there. Last time we spoke, we were sitting in the backyard, by the pool on a beautiful mother’s day. I had just flown in. I sat down with her, gave her a hug and her first words were… “So what are you doing now?” 
The last letter I received was a while ago. They were in regards to a play I had written that she had not been able to attend. 

“I was so pleased and delighted that to see that you are pursuing your interests in the theatre. Know you have a gift; I am proud that you are using that precious gift.! I would have loved to see your contribution/production and have loved having the program your Mom brought me gracing my counter.”

Yesterday, at work, I commented that I was saddened for a reason I didn’t know. I attributed it to the gloomy day, or little petty things adding up at work, but it didn’t make sense. Throughout the day, it seemed to get darker and more turbulent inside me. By the time I rushed out of work, I knew something was off. It was then I saw I had a voicemail from my mom.

“Grandma Randy passed away this morning….”

We had known it was coming, so I wasn’t surprised, but nothing could take away the sadness. Not just that she was gone, but because the world lost someone amazing. Everyone needs a mentor like that. Everyone needs that support and love that only a beautiful and inspiring person can give. I know that when I have been sad, those books have brought me back. When I have felt frustrated, those letters have helped relieve the anger. When I have felt like giving up, those words have encouraged me to keep going. 

On the middle of my bookshelf is a series of books that given from on theatre lover to another. They have moved with me from Covina, to Orange County to New York and carry the words of amazing playwrights, masterful storytellers and also, no not also, but most importantly, they carry the words of one amazing mentor.

And as I write a final thank you letter in my head, but the only words that come are her own inspiring words. 

“I like the feel like having shared pages and the reminder that I have spent a lot of time with this verbal friend”

I love you and miss you Grandma Randy

Love Mark